Finding my perfect person

I am currently single. For the first time in about 5 years.

It’s been bought to my attention that I need to surround myself only with people who bring something positive to a situation. That can be a variety of things; a challenge, encouragement, support, honesty, humour, many things. Instead over this period of time, I have noticed that my life seems to have these… negative people sitting on the sidelines and I want them gone.

I’m now taking stock of what I want in a partner. Now most of these characteristics can be transferred into the friend category also. After speaking with my therapist about where I am at in regards to relationships and friends, she has suggested that work out what I want, in quite a broad sense, being as vain as I like, and to include everything I can think of in the person I wish to have by my side.

A sense of humour is a big thing. Everyone wants to be made to laugh. They have to make me laugh and find me funny too. They’ve got to embrace my weird, English, kind of off-key humour.

They need to be intelligent, but not wanky about it. I want to know that their head is working all of the time, but I don’t want it shoved in my or anyone else’s face.

They have to have nice friends and they need to be prepared to totally get on board with my friends. Because my friends are totally my world.

They have to love food, and going to restaurants, and enjoy a drink, liking wine is a big bonus – but no chardonnay lovers please. They should be a good cook, and like vegetarian food and understand that left over pizza should always be reheated.

samesame rollercoastersThey should love my nerdiness, and embrace the Buffy. I’d like them to love music and films and enjoy going to the movies (with and without subtitles).


They should be motivated and driven in most things that they do. Arty or creative in some way would be a massive bonus. They need to be encouraging and passionate. And switched on. They need to be ‘together’.

Now I am a sheet-hogger. Like, in a really bad way. They are just going to have to be able to accept that. I’d like them to be considerate, in every way. Like little things, like offering me glass of juice when I’m getting ready in the mornings.

They have to have an outfit that makes me weak at the knees. Nothing kinky, but that’s when I know it’s really real, when they come out wearing whatever, nothing special and it makes me go weak.

Books. They need to love books. Like really love books. And really love music. Live music. Travel! Ah! They have to love to travel. And to experience new things. And be ok with holding my hand when I’m scared.

They need to be clean, and not get too angry when I leave things around. I’m a clean person, but I’m a nightmare for just putting things down.

Looks wise, I’m not too fussed. They have to have nice eyes. And nice hands! Hands are a big thing for me. They have to be ok with me being touchy feely (because I am. I really am). I’d like them to enjoy closeness and be very aware of how their actions affect others, both intentionally and unintentionally.

Over 27. And hair that they look after. Yeah, their eyes should be engaging. My height, I guess. Although that’s not an issue for me. But they do need to be OK with the 5 inch heels I wear and that I’m almost 6ft tall.

They have to be ready for a rollercoaster ride. And get that I’m a workaholic.

They need to be OK with PDA’s.

They’ve got to be OK with both early early nights and late late nights. And like just lying on the couch, intertwined.

So that is my perfect person. Are they out there?

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