The Six Lesbians You’ll Date Before You Die.

This post was originally posted on SameSame.com.au. You can view it here.

So I’m bisexual. There. I said it. 

I like girls. I love girls. But I love guys too.

For a long time I was in a same sex relationship and I considered myself to be gay. A lesbo. The idea that I would ever be with anyone else, let alone a guy was completely foreign to me. Thus I saw myself as lesbian.

Looking at me and my ex we were probably a pretty stereotypical lesbian couple. I’m fem, a lipstick, girly, whatever you want to brand me as. She is not. She is what I would refer to as a chap stick lesbian. Since we have broken up I have dated a couple of girls but for whatever reason, nothing eventuated. Currently I’m dating a guy who I can safely say does not fit into the scale of which I am about to discuss.

A week or so ago friend of mine forwarded me the video below and it got me thinking. If all girls fall into these six categories; how many of them have I dated, or have I dated a mix of them all?

Usually I am very against the whole categorising, stereotyping bullshit that comes with “the scene” and with life in general but I figure I can play this game once or twice.

So… The Six Lesbians You’ll Date Before You Die:

The Softball Player. While I can’t put my finger on this person exactly, there have been girls that definitely have an aspect of this.

The Lipstick Lesbian. Ok so I met this girl a few weeks ago. She was amazing. Nothing eventuated but wow. Like wow.

The Closet Lesbian. Thankfully, every girl I have dated has been happy for me to hold their hand as we’re walking down the street. Which is a good thing. Because this is every out girls nightmare.

The Straight Girl. Ah. Yes the straight girl….. Be still my heart…. Let’s call you…. Edith. Funny, sexy, confident, actually said the words (or words to the effect) to me “I’m not into girls, but there’s just something about you.” A very rushed encounter and then back to the straight world she went. I totally would have rocked her world… If only she’d let me….

The Feminist. A girl I dated has aspects of this but I have realised that I don’t need to date the feminist because my best friends are this girl (although unlike the girl in the video they are, thankfully, aware of razors)

The Best Friend. I have fallen for my best friend a couple of times, both male and female. This is always the hard one. The hardest break up, the hardest to get over. But probably the one who was most worth the risk. Let’s call her Jasmine.

While the video made me laugh, I have come to decision that while these six traits are often seen, I don’t think people will automatically be one of these girls. In my experience, while some of the girls I have dated/seen/hooked up with are definitely more like ones of these girls than any other, I think mostly it is aspects of each of the six make up each and every perfect girl.

BUT. If that’s not true and for argument’s sake each and every person fills one category, which one am I?

Definitely not girl number one, three or four, but maybe I’m one of others. Unfortunately I feel myself leaning towards The Lipstick in the video… but I do like vagina’s, I promise!